A list of my goals for service are below.
• Increase social skill comfort
• Develop grassroots project/community skills/experience
• Increase personal generosity
• Deepen my understanding of humanity
• Develop lifelong friends and memories
• Achieve proficiency with Nepali language
• Regular exercise
• Increase nutritional and dietary knowledge
• Discover/develop international job opportunities
These are all notably self-centric (I am American, after all). I will have an impact in Nepal, but what that impact will be feels much less within my control, so I've limited my goals to things that I have more control over.
Social skills. I have anxiety. With that comes an incredible amount of social anxiety. This fact is not always evident to people, but to me it is a pervasive and omnipresent reality; even more of one in Nepal. So after two years of talking to a lot (a lot) of people, every day, for many reasons, but more often no reason whatsoever, I hope to return to the United States with much more comfort in engaging with others. Ideally I return with broader comfort, interest, and ease in initiating and carrying conversations with strangers, which is generally a struggle.
Grassroots development competence. Grassroots development is about connecting with people, and then connecting people with people. It’s about collection and collaboration; about looking for, finding, and creating opportunities – sometimes where there were none before. Exactly what does this mean? I also want to know. I feel like I can feel it, but I can’t exactly say. In this way it seems a difficult and somewhat mysterious concept, likely due to its heavy dependency on organic and social interaction (see above). After I come out of PC though, I hope to have developed comfort in people-to-people connecting and project-building in a resource-scarce environment.
Generosity. I feel miserly sometimes – with my time, actions, and resources. Since arriving in Nepal, I have been regularly humbled by the everyday generosity of everyday Nepali. I intend to come out of service a more generous and loving person. I hope this is true especially after I’m back in the States where our culture is much more self-centric; aphno-aphno (own-own). While it is important to take care of my own needs and wants, it’s important to bridge my life with others’ lives, too. The older I get the more important community is.
A better understanding of humanity. This is something that my friend Ian said our first week in country, and it stuck with me. It sounds deep. Maybe it is. Maybe it isn't. We all know what humanity is, and what people are like; but somehow it hits different in the Peace Corps. Humanity seems to have fewer layers. Perhaps it is that we have fewer barriers to its experience. Overall, I think what I seek is a stronger connection to it, and feel that a process to one has already begun.
Lifelong friends and memories. Easy.
Nepali proficiency. Obvious, but important to me. As part of Peace Corps programming, we’re mandated to take a standardized language interview called the LPI (I don’t remember what this stands for) at key points during service. By the end of service, I hope to break into the Advanced – Low proficiency level for Nepali; perhaps even Advanced – Intermediate.
Regular exercise. My goal is to develop a 2-hour/week exercise habit as a lifestyle. This sounds like nothing – but trust me when I say that the only time I have ever “exercised” regularly was a summer during college in which I commuted to work by bike. (I suppose another time would have been junior high when I had swim practice twice a week; however, despite my appreciation for this experience now, at the time my participation was coerced and therefore doesn’t count.) Though I love to hike, swim, and walk, I have never found exercise for exercise’s sake motivating or fun... so I’ll be working to change that. I have a selection of yoga/stretching/physiotherapy/body-workout books, my resistance bands, yoga mat, and a great opportunity to find out what will work for me.
Nutritional and dietary competence. For as much food as I eat, and how much I love it, I know little about what or how I should be eating. So, I’m looking forward to reading and exploring nutrition for the benefit of my community (and myself)! Nutrition is a core subject of Peace Corps Nepal's food security program, after all. I brought several technical resources that are way beyond the expectations of Peace Corps. Catch me reading my digital textbooks every night? We’ll see. To accomplish this goal I intend to read one of my nutrition textbooks cover to cover.
International job opportunities for the future. This goal means landing an interview for an international position (either fully international or with 50%+ time being spent traveling) within 2 years of my service being over, assuming I apply for one. I have no plans for my life after service currently, and think an international job would be rewarding. The path to get me to one seems like a nebulous progression but in practice it is probably not. The future is murky, though; I’ll probably come back to this consideration more seriously a year into service.
Many of my goals lack quantifiers and measurements. Is that a problem?
Serious question.
Some part of me – the scientist – says yes. Measurements encourage and motivate action. They examine, they catharize. They drive results.
From my observations, it appears that Peace Corps is becoming more measure- and data-driven. I can understand why. In Peace Corps lie the necessities of supporting its legitimate and moral credit, its international relationships, and stakeholder investments, which is sometimes to volunteers’ chagrin. In one training session, we discussed the first three months of living at our permanent sites. Most of our expectations for this time consist of learning Nepali, meeting people, and assessing resources and project potentials. “How many neighbors did you talk to before reaching this information?" asked our reporting manager, Raju. "How many cups of tea did you drink?” He was joking, but there was some seriousness in the message: capture as much data as possible. In the same session we were handed a checklist of expectations that boiled down to “get to know your village and just talk to people”. On the checklist read items such as “two neighbors know why PCV is at site”; “PCV spends 30 minutes a day talking to host family members”; “PCV feels comfortable talking to a community member over the phone”. To some PCVs this type of itemization felt contrived. Claustrophobic, even. Stringent apostles of data science in response might say: “If you can’t measure it, it doesn’t exist."
The truth of the matter is: the intangibles are what make Peace Corps, Peace Corps. They are what make the tangible, tangible. The small moments; the mornings drinking tea with neighbors; the shared experiences, the unspoken emotions; and the chaotic and inextricable web of time, decisions, people, and engagements that eventually culminate in community development, enriched lives, and lifelong memories – this is how it happens. Quantifying these experiences in the ways that we can may represent something: it may fulfill a quota, or checklist; it may assure PCVs, and others, that something, anything, is occurring; it may even encourage action – but overall it can represent these experiences in no holistic or honest way. To this end, the human experience cannot be measured, regardless of the number of hours talking to a host family, or the number of cups of tea drunk.
Therefore, despite the poignant lack of quantifiers in many of my aspirations above, I validate them in the name of holism. In the name of holism!
Isn't that what Peace Corps is all about?
I guess we'll find out.
LPI: Language Proficiency Interview. Just looked it up.
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